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SAMPLE TEXT FROM "THE BOOK OF NEOGENESIS"

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{From the Introduction}

            The bottom line is that belief in Darwinian-style Evolution is a religion; you have to BELIEVE that there is no God, and that man, and all life on earth arose out of non-life (ultimately from inorganic rocks); it cannot be empirically proven. Evolution in the Darwinist sense is not a theory at all; it is a fantasy that has to be accepted on FAITH. There is no evidence at all to support it, and the "evidence” has been tendered in the past to attempt to support the theory, has ALL been proven to be an error, or an outright fraud. 

            Therefore, it occurred to me that what the Big Bangers and Evolutionists need, is a Bible to go with their religion. Once they are accepted by the IRS as a bona-fide religion, they can then ordain ministers, preachers, and become §501 (c) (3) [tax exempt] corporations and preach Darwinism to their heart's content. Those of us who know better can then seize the opportunity to sue them in Federal Court for “violation of the separation of Church and State”, because the government would then be “officially” guilty of sponsoring that religion in our public schools. In this little treatise, I’ve given the Darwinists a head start on their "Bible" on the following pages:


{From Chapter One of NeoGenesis}


1.      In the beginning, there was really no beginning, as time did not yet exist; and to begin, there must be a time to start, but there was no time. Therefore, you really couldn't start anything, because you'd never know when it would be finished.

2.      There was only a tiny speck of infinite density where there was literally nothing - not even empty space.

3.      And the speck was comprised of everything that was to be, but it was really nothing at all in the middle of nowhere, and ex-post-facto[1], man called it a Singularity.[2]

4.      And the Singularity itself, was both nothing, and the potential to become everything at the same time, in a no-place where there was no time.

5.      There was no time; because time is an apparency;[3] a perception of motion. And you can't have time without motion, or motion without space to move in, and the time to get there.

6.      And there was no motion for lack of the space to move about; there was no inside or outside, or up or down, left or right, or sideways.

7.      And there was no sentient[4] being to perceive that there was nothing moving, and that there was no point of reference to be able to tell.

8.    But the Singularity was pregnant with a potential universe.


FOOTNOTES

[1] Ex-post Facto - "after the fact".
[2] Singularity - a theoretical mass of zero size (volume) and infinite density.
[3] Apparency - that which appears to be, but is not.
[4] Sentient - aware of being aware - only humans and God are sentient.
 


{From Chapter Two of NeoGenesis}

58.     And  Eve got twisted, and she ran off giggling like a two-year-old, to find Adam.

59.     When Adam heard her silly giggling and saw her running butt-naked through the garden, he caught her and admonished her saying, "Woman, what have I to do with thee?"

60.     To which Eve responded by taking another toke, and then kissing Adam, giving him the prius "shotgun".

61.     And Adam caught a buzz, and thought to himself, "This is better than Bud-Wiser."

62.     So soon, Adam and Eve fell in flagrante delicto, and there was nobody who cared; and besides, whom could they be reported to?

63.     But they were happy together, being Sui Generis, in bed smoking blunts, eating Twinkies, and munching on Doritos.

64.     And suddenly the voice of Nada thundered from the depths of the forest, as the Serpent peeped out from behind a bush;

65.     The voice called to Adam in the cool of the day saying, "What the Hell hast thou done?"

66.     Adam's mens rea was quick to answer, "Well, I know that she's my daughter, but..."

67.     And the voice cut him off in mid-sentence: "no, not THAT; did you eat of the tree in the center of the garden, whereof thine Elders hath told thee "Thou shalt not even TOUCH  it?"

68.     And Adam replied, "No, we did not EAT of the tree, but the woman that Evolution hath given to me, she hath given me shotgun of the burning dried leaves, and of the buds of the tree in question, and I did take a few tokes... But I didn't inhale..."

69.     And the voice turned to Eve and said, "What hast thou to say for thyself, young lady?" 

70.     And Eve, typical of a teen-ager replied, "Respondeat Superior,[1] man! The Serpent, he beguiled me, and besides, nobody never said nuthin' 'bout smokin' trees, man!, so chill out", and then she turned to Adam and asked "Got any more onion dip, babe?"
 

FOOTNOTES

[1] Respondeat superior - let the master (superior) answer.
 


{From Chapter Three of NeoGenesis}

1.      As Adam and Eve ran from the forest, Eve started giggling uncontrollably, collapsing on the grass, exhausted.

2.      And Adam said to her, "What's so funny? - We just got evicted from the best crib on the planet!" And Eve responded, "Yo, Adam, that Nada dude was mad funny! He chopped off Sakla's legs... Like the black knight in the forest in Monty Python's.....  {{Toke}} Samurai Tree-smoker hah, hah, hah!"

3.      As Eve was hysterical, Adam stood there dumbfounded. He never heard of Monty Python, and he narrowly looked upon her and said, "Eve, what have I to do with thee?"

4.      And she coyly looked away as she walked into the tall grass, then glancing back, saying, "Adam, sweetie,  {{Toke}} you KNOW what you have to do with me."

5.      And Adam said to her, "Didst thou save the roach of the blunt thereof?"

6.      And Eve replied, "Yes, dear, it's in my purse along with a key and a large bag of Doritos."

7.      And the two of them partook of the remnant of the tree, and were soon in flagrante delicto in the field of tall grass.

8.      Soon it came to pass that Eve was with child, and when her time had come to be delivered, it was a boy, and they called his name Toke, because he had been conceived under the influence.
 

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"The Book of Neogenesis - The Evolution of Mankind From Rocks"

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REWARD 

    A $250,000 REWARD is offered to anyone who can prove “evolution” using empirical scientific methodology. For those atheists who need a down payment on a house, or two or three Hummers in the driveway, put your “science” to work, and claim your fortune, or forever hold your peace. Log onto: www.drdino.com for further information.


 

 

 

 

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